LGBT talk

Open Letter to Parents: Your Kid Might Be Gay

an article the Trevor Project tweeted today.

Quote :

The idea of having a gay child scares a lot of parents. They want their kids to be happy. They want them to be healthy. They want them to grow into successful adults, who go on to create wonderful families of their own.

Being gay doesn't take any of those things off the table. Heck, if we all work hard enough against hate in this country, they could even legally give you the white wedding you have always dreamed of.

All parents have dreams for their children. Heck, I have a ton. But we can't let our dreams for them become more important than who they are and what they want for themselves. Our children aren't little photocopies of us. They are their own unique people who have a path all their own.

wish my parents could have read this when I was a kid

^ Yup me too

Me three

I don't think it would have made a difference to mine...

@ Shanna - We've all done questionable things that we may or may not regret. Remember my sleeping with my ex and her girlfriend ordeal? Did you see that over on GF? And there's plenty more where that came from.

The point of this post is that you've got to stop being so hard on yourself. It's a waste of your energy. There are plenty of really awesome things about you that you don't focus on. And I'm sure there are lots of good things you've done that you don't think about in the way you do with the 'bad' things or the things that have left you feeling like your heart has been ripped out of your chest.

I think I've lost my way with this post now. Hope that at least some of it makes sense.

Thank you for that. Honestly I have a lot of guilt issues which are just a symptom of somthing else. I'm aware of them so I have an ok handle on them. I just needed to beat myself up for a few hours and all will be fine.

Shanna_ wrote:

Thank you for that. Honestly I have a lot of guilt issues which are just a symptom of somthing else. I'm aware of them so I have an ok handle on them. I just needed to beat myself up for a few hours and all will be fine.

It's okay. It's just difficult to see someone be hard on themselves all the time without saying something.

Shanna_ wrote:

Thank you for that. Honestly I have a lot of guilt issues which are just a symptom of somthing else. I'm aware of them so I have an ok handle on them. I just needed to beat myself up for a few hours and all will be fine.

Don't beat yourself up too much. I think we've all done things we're not proud of. I don't think your a bad person.

I'm afraid to care too much, and I'm afraid of serious relationships. I'm usually the one to end things in relationships, when things start to get too serious, and I often feel like there's something wrong with me because of that. I wish I could just get past it.

Oooh I was just sent this link

Lesbian Themed Booklists
bookmarked!

was dying to use this smiley

I'm gonna check that list when I'm home.

Btw, I think we need more gay smilies.

I'll try and google it...

oh god, there are porn smileys out there. smh

LOL I didn't see there was more smilies! Our collection is just awesome.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-16490602

"A fourth leaflet, called Dead Derby, which compared homosexuals to paedophiles was found, but not distributed." WTF?

"Mr Ali approached police a few weeks before the gay pride event to ask about a counter-protest by members of the Muslim community." Admittedly, there are problems with racisim in this country, but it's asshats like this that cause these issues sometimes. How dare they try to represent the Muslim community as a whole. I have plenty of Muslim friends who are educated enough not to take the teachings of their holy book to these extremes and who are quite shocked and appalled at this behaviour.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-16581758

Things like this really irritate me. Everyone is entitled to their opinion etc. But SERIOUSLY: "My duty is not just to better myself but to try and better the society I live in." Go and live in a different fucking society then.

Huh?

Every Muslim I've met, including the imam at my local mosque, has been incredibly supportive of gay rights. They constantly stress equality above all, "God requires equality" "God made everyone equal" "There is no one better person except he who accepts God". Bullcrap like that.

It's like any religion, it's up to the individual to pervert it to further their own personal, cultural, or tribal aims.

I know right? I've never personally met any Muslim person who isn't supportive. But unfortunately, people like the ones in these articles do exist.

I thought this was interesting enough to post here:



Cynthia Nixon on being gay: "For me it's a choice"

Quote :

I gave a speech recently, an empowerment speech to a gay audience, and it included the line ‘I’ve been straight and I’ve been gay, and gay is better.’ And they tried to get me to change it, because they said it implies that homosexuality can be a choice. And for me, it is a choice. I understand that for many people it’s not, but for me it’s a choice, and you don’t get to define my gayness for me. A certain section of our community is very concerned that it not be seen as a choice, because if it’s a choice, then we could opt out. I say it doesn’t matter if we flew here or we swam here, it matters that we are here and we are one group and let us stop trying to make a litmus test for who is considered gay and who is not.

In defense of Cynthia Nixon

Quote :

I empathize with people who believe that Cynthia Nixon may in fact simply be bisexual, and thus that being with women may represent making a "choice" between the two genders to which she is already attracted. But this identification of our sexuality is rather artificial. Likely, no one is genetically created to love a specific body part. There are probably many things we inherit and also experience once we are created (in the womb and outside of it) that flip our triggers -- it could be gender, but it could also be dozens of other things. Why do we like someone with dark hair, or someone who is short, or tall, or with blue eyes, or male, female, or transgender?

Opinions? I have conflicted feelings. For me, it's definitely not a choice. It's just the way it is. But I can definitely see what Nixon is try to say and I completely agree with her right to define herself whatever way she wants.

Funny, but I kinda also agree with this:

Quote :

This was an incredibly irresponsible interview.

From here.

It is dangerous to say that publically.

Yeah she can define herself however she's comfortable.

Wait is she saying that she's equally attracted to men and women, but choosing to be with a woman??
Confusing.

I haven't seen her around for a while. Perhaps she thought this would be a good way to get back in the public eye? Cheers, love. Now all the bible bashers are going to use the reasoning that if it is, in fact, a choice, then we can choose not to be gay... CN said so, so it must be true. So, why harp on about equal rights and gay marriage and adoption and IVF when we can just choose the easy route?

Props to her for the honesty though. I don't doubt that a lot of people feel this way about their own sexuality. It's just awkward because someone in the media voicing something like this has greater political implications. I hate politics. Lol.

So basically what she is saying is that she is bi, but prefers women, and don't want to be labeled or defined by others? So the choice she really is making, is to make people confused, instead of just owning up to the fact.

From what I get she was saying this in response to having been asked to change her original speech, so I see what she is trying to say. If it's a choice to her (and I think the fact that she is bissexual is the point here) who's to say it's not? She is not talking about the entire community, she is talking about herself.

But... going around saying that, at this time, it's dangerous. And what does she mean by "gay is better"? Gay shouldn't be better or worse.

I know I don't choose to be attracted to both men and women. I only choose who I date.

Isabela wrote:

But... going around saying that, at this time, it's dangerous. And what does she mean by "gay is better"? Gay shouldn't be better or worse.

I guess she means she prefers to be with women. Kind of bad choice of words though.

Jugz da' Clown wrote:

I know I don't choose to be attracted to both men and women. I only choose who I date.

That's exactly who I am....I choose who I'm attracted to by their personality and looks not by their gender.

I still go by Holly Holiday's quote: "It's not about who you fall in love with ultimately it's about who you fall in love with"

You mean it's not about who you're attracted to. IDK. Who you are attracted to does define your sexuality, but it doesn't necessarily define your romantic relationships. So I believe a person can be bisexual but "homoromantic" or "heteromantic". Ultimately if you are in a monogamous relationship with someone, it'll be seen as "picking a team". But your attraction to both men and women would still exist, so you'd still be bisexual. Unless you were never attracted to anyone other than the person you're with, but how common is that?