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 LGBT talk

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eli_

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Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

PostSubject: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 5:15 pm

I've always wanted a place where we can swap stories and discuss things related to the LGBT community, since looks like almost everyone on this forum is part of it asd
First question I'd love to ask: how/when did you realize you were gay/bi etc?
From my esperience, people usually
- always knew
- realized it during puberty (that's me)
or
- only realized it much later in life
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Isa

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Posts : 3823

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 5:21 pm

idea Finally!


Ok, I think I started suspecting when I when I was like 16 or something, but I only decided to act on it when I was 19-20. By then I had no gay friends and I didn't feel like talking to my girl friends so it was kinda difficult because I just didn't know what to do. It took me a while to actually do something. When I was 22 I finally met some lesbians and some months later I finally kissed a girl and I liked it. Never kissed a guy again since then.
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:01 pm

I always knew. I first kissed a girl when I was around 13. She was my best friend at school. We used to kiss and stuff all the time. Then she got a boyfriend and broke my heart. We stopped talking after that. Sad

I first slept with a girl when I was 16, she was 24, we were together for nearly 2 years. She turned into a 'see you next Tuesday', she started using the age difference to manipulate me. Everything I did was wrong, it didn't matter what I said. She broke up with me and told me she didn't love me anymore when she went to America for a couple of months. Then changed her mind and said it was the biggest mistake she ever made blah blah. We got back together and I broke up with her a few months later because I couldn't cope with the mind games anymore.

I've only kissed two guys. One was when I was 15 and I was absolutely smashed because of tequila. I was so had I didn't even know what I was doing, when I 'woke up' some guy from my year in school had his tongue down my throat. I sobered up pretty quick after that. Lol. I also kissed my housemate once because he was upset that he had only been hit on by guys. It hilarious and super awkward.

I've never, ever slept with a guy.

I later found out that I'm allergic to tequila btw. Explains a lot...


Last edited by Charlie on Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:34 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Shanna_

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Posts : 1747
Location : Ohio

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:20 pm

I think I always knew but I was so not ok with it. I was convinced I was going to Hell by the time I was 9 because I knew something wasn't right with me. Accepting myself has been an uphill climb to say the least. I have dated so many guys in the past with that hope that something would change if I tried hard enough. I didn't want to face my family if I accepted myself. I grew up with too many comments to believe that things would be ok if I pursued anything. It's sad that the motivation for anything in my life has been death. I was only able to take a chance on my feelings once my dad and both of his parents were dead. They were too scary to disappoint. I only talked to my mom after the person I was in love with died in a car accident. I realized then that life was too short and I had to stop trying to please everyone else. It's hard for me still because I pretended for so long. I manipulate guys still because the facade is second nature. I'm the worst lesbian ever because I've played the role "straight girl" so long that it's hard to seperate the fact and fiction. Hmmm, I think I'm depressing.
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:31 pm

Isabela wrote:
idea Finally!


Ok, I think I started suspecting when I when I was like 16 or something, but I only decided to act on it when I was 19-20. By then I had no gay friends and I didn't feel like talking to my girl friends so it was kinda difficult because I just didn't know what to do. It took me a while to actually do something. When I was 22 I finally met some lesbians and some months later I finally kissed a girl and I liked it. Never kissed a guy again since then.

Kissed a girl and you liked it. Hehe. I see what you did there! tongue Must have been hard not having anyone to talk to about it for that long. Hug
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Isa

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Posts : 3823

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:38 pm

Oh, Shanna... Hug

Charlie wrote:
Kissed a girl and you liked it. Hehe. I see what you did there! tongue Must have been hard not having anyone to talk to about it for that long. Hug

Wink

But, yeah, it was hard and confusing. I still don't have many gay friends, which, I think, explains why I'm so obsessed with this place/GF.
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:40 pm

Shanna_ wrote:
I think I always knew but I was so not ok with it. I was convinced I was going to Hell by the time I was 9 because I knew something wasn't right with me. Accepting myself has been an uphill climb to say the least. I have dated so many guys in the past with that hope that something would change if I tried hard enough. I didn't want to face my family if I accepted myself. I grew up with too many comments to believe that things would be ok if I pursued anything. It's sad that the motivation for anything in my life has been death. I was only able to take a chance on my feelings once my dad and both of his parents were dead. They were too scary to disappoint. I only talked to my mom after the person I was in love with died in a car accident. I realized then that life was too short and I had to stop trying to please everyone else. It's hard for me still because I pretended for so long. I manipulate guys still because the facade is second nature. I'm the worst lesbian ever because I've played the role "straight girl" so long that it's hard to seperate the fact and fiction. Hmmm, I think I'm depressing.

You're not depressing. Yeah, some bad things have happened in your life but I think how you've dealt with them says a lot about your character. And sometimes bad things are a catalyst for people to realise something that was in them all along, that they are strong and brave enough to be who they are, to show the world who they are and not give a shit what the world thinks.
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:41 pm

Isabela wrote:
Oh, Shanna... Hug

Charlie wrote:
Kissed a girl and you liked it. Hehe. I see what you did there! tongue Must have been hard not having anyone to talk to about it for that long. Hug

Wink

But, yeah, it was hard and confusing. I still don't have many gay friends, which, I think, explains why I'm so obsessed with this place/GF.

I'll be a gay friend! Laughing
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:42 pm

Oh, and Eli? Get your story over here. smile
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Isa

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Posts : 3823

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:43 pm

Charlie wrote:
I'll be a gay friend! Laughing


You already are, dear. love
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:44 pm

Isabela wrote:
Charlie wrote:
I'll be a gay friend! Laughing


You already are, dear. love

yahoo Hug
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:46 pm

Oh, I also had a very strange relationship with my English Literature teacher when I was 15. I think that's what made me really think 'yeah, this is fine, I'm normal'. Not that I was ever in denial before. I just kind of accepted that I was 'weird'.
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Alison DiLaurentis

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Posts : 3901

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 6:55 pm

Isabela wrote:
idea Finally!


Ok, I think I started suspecting when I when I was like 16 or something, but I only decided to act on it when I was 19-20. By then I had no gay friends and I didn't feel like talking to my girl friends so it was kinda difficult because I just didn't know what to do. It took me a while to actually do something. When I was 22 I finally met some lesbians and some months later I finally kissed a girl and I liked it. Never kissed a guy again since then.
And how did you do this? Cause i'm dying here. All the experiences i've had with girls have been my friends and i having little "things". One was pretty significant though. Ugh, i dunno.

@Shanna Just Hug
@Charlie-good for you for breaking up with her in the end. No one likes to fucked with.

My story-idek- when did i realise? I think i started having feelings towards women (i.e. not girls my age) when i was like 13, but i always thought i just really admired them..then later on, maybe at 15? i started thinking about "gay" as a label and fighting the idea off. Also started liking someone my own age at that point... from then on, i think i started to "embrace the gay" with the help of TLW lol.

As for experience- so messy. Umm first almost-sexual experience with a girl at 14.... Then some other stuff along the way with other people....... Always liked it though smile
With my ex boyfriend- sex was boring, the relationship was boring, i was the worst girlfriend ever haha. I pretty much faked everything and didnt feel bad for him at all.


EDIT- Wow, why do i not use punctuation correctly? It's annoying me.
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Shanna_

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Posts : 1747
Location : Ohio

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:02 pm

My journey also led to the worst advice ever. I was a hot mess for awhile so I decided to see someone about my steamer trunk of issues and advice to my trying to come to terms was go out and sleep with a lot of guys. She said that some meaningless flings would make things easier. I'm a little impressionable and decided that if that was what the professional thought I should do then that's what i'd do. Who knew that slutting it up was thought of as a good thing?
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Isa

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Posts : 3823

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:12 pm

voteforalice1 wrote:
And how did you do this? Cause i'm dying here. All the experiences i've had with girls have been my friends and i having little "things". One was pretty significant though. Ugh, i dunno.

Well, I spend two years trying to figure out what to do, because, as I said before, I had no gay friends and I'm just terrible as expressing my feelings. Also, all my crushes were fairly straight girls back then, so I had no experience, no gay friends, nothing. So after sometime I approached one girl on the internet. She was friends with a group of lesbians from my town and I was just trying to be friends with them, but I ended up meeting her and going out with her for some weeks. This girl and this group were kinda awful though and had nothing to do with me but meeting them made me met a girl some months after that who ended up being my trully first love. And she was the girl I told you guys some days ago, that is now engaged to a guy.
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:27 pm

Rosie, Sydney has a massive gay scene. You just need to get yourself out there. Do you have friends that know and that would he happy to go with you to gay clubs or something?

The only other thing I can think of is I'll have to come over there myself and take you out. Wink
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:30 pm

Isabela wrote:
voteforalice1 wrote:
And how did you do this? Cause i'm dying here. All the experiences i've had with girls have been my friends and i having little "things". One was pretty significant though. Ugh, i dunno.

Well, I spend two years trying to figure out what to do, because, as I said before, I had no gay friends and I'm just terrible as expressing my feelings. Also, all my crushes were fairly straight girls back then, so I had no experience, no gay friends, nothing. So after sometime I approached one girl on the internet. She was friends with a group of lesbians from my town and I was just trying to be friends with them, but I ended up meeting her and going out with her for some weeks. This girl and this group were kinda awful though and had nothing to do with me but meeting them made me met a girl some months after that who ended up being my trully first love. And she was the girl I told you guys some days ago, that is now engaged to a guy.

Haa... talking of straight girl crushes, my last 3 girlfriends were 'straight' before. And one of them is straight again now.
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Alison DiLaurentis

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Posts : 3901

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:38 pm

Charlie wrote:
Rosie, Sydney has a massive gay scene. You just need to get yourself out there. Do you have friends that know and that would he happy to go with you to gay clubs or something?

The only other thing I can think of is I'll have to come over there myself and take you out. Wink
Yeah i guess... I just hate clubs, i hate dancing (cause i don't know how). I like bars and pubs so i can just drink and talk lol. Really need to work on the dancing issue because it totally limits me Evil or Very Mad

And yes, i think you should come over here! Maybe i'll take a trip to Wales for my Uni placements haha tongue
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:49 pm

voteforalice1 wrote:
Charlie wrote:
Rosie, Sydney has a massive gay scene. You just need to get yourself out there. Do you have friends that know and that would he happy to go with you to gay clubs or something?

The only other thing I can think of is I'll have to come over there myself and take you out. Wink
Yeah i guess... I just hate clubs, i hate dancing (cause i don't know how). I like bars and pubs so i can just drink and talk lol. Really need to work on the dancing issue because it totally limits me Evil or Very Mad

And yes, i think you should come over here! Maybe i'll take a trip to Wales for my Uni placements haha tongue

You don't have to dance just cuz you're at a club. Just get tipsy and talk to some pretty ladies. smile

Yeah, come here we have hospitals. Lmao. Cardiff uni is pretty good for medical type stuff I think so I'm sure there are good opportunities for stuff like that. I could introduce you to some awesome places/people, it would be ace. Except for the fact that we have shitty weather. Lol.

I'm definitely coming back to Oz soon. Even if it's just for a couple of weeks. Maybe April... I dunno, see what my money situation is like and stuff first.
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Alison DiLaurentis

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Posts : 3901

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 8:03 pm

Charlie wrote:

You don't have to dance just cuz you're at a club. Just get tipsy and talk to some pretty ladies. smile

Yeah, come here we have hospitals. Lmao. Cardiff uni is pretty good for medical type stuff I think so I'm sure there are good opportunities for stuff like that. I could introduce you to some awesome places/people, it would be ace. Except for the fact that we have shitty weather. Lol.

I'm definitely coming back to Oz soon. Even if it's just for a couple of weeks. Maybe April... I dunno, see what my money situation is like and stuff first.
Oh good, i wasn't sure tongue .... Hmm, would be awesome though.
Yeah i dunno, tossing up between the US or UK. LOL that i'm thinking about my 3rd year and haven't even started yr1. Damn.
(getting OT, oops)
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 8:06 pm

voteforalice1 wrote:
Charlie wrote:

You don't have to dance just cuz you're at a club. Just get tipsy and talk to some pretty ladies. smile

Yeah, come here we have hospitals. Lmao. Cardiff uni is pretty good for medical type stuff I think so I'm sure there are good opportunities for stuff like that. I could introduce you to some awesome places/people, it would be ace. Except for the fact that we have shitty weather. Lol.

I'm definitely coming back to Oz soon. Even if it's just for a couple of weeks. Maybe April... I dunno, see what my money situation is like and stuff first.
Oh good, i wasn't sure tongue .... Hmm, would be awesome though.
Yeah i dunno, tossing up between the US or UK. LOL that i'm thinking about my 3rd year and haven't even started yr1. Damn.
(getting OT, oops)

lulz Just making sure you knew that they're not all in England. Wink

Off topic naughtiness... Lol. Either the UK or the USA would be super awesome.
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mardou

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Posts : 648

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 9:50 pm

I'll tell my story later, this awful restaurant wifi is driving me crazy. Nice topic, I've read everything. I'Ll have to catch up later yahoo
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Melissa

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Posts : 106
Location : Canada

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Wed Jan 04, 2012 9:53 pm

It seems odd having a thread for lgbt talk when the whole forum seems to intertwine the subject Very Happy
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Charles

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Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Thu Jan 05, 2012 5:03 am

I dunno, I know that the whole board is kinda gay based on it's topic, but I think this thread is nice. Somewhere where people can talk about their experiences etc. specifically.
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Jugz da' Clown

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PostSubject: Re: LGBT talk    Thu Jan 05, 2012 12:59 pm

My first kiss was with my best friend whe I was 12, at it happened because we were both really curious. I was more into it than her though and I pushed it further to full make-out session and sexual touching. I also kissed another one of my girl friends at that age. Then my friends moved away because they were army brats like me. Sad
Then I moved too the suburbs of Baltimore in 8th grade and made new friends, all girls again, and I thought I might have been a lesbian because I was more interested in fooling around with girl than I was in flirting with guys. And this boy in gym class called me a lesbian because I threw a basketball too hard at him. Rolling Eyes I was a bit weird and I was more interested in school and art than the boys in school, who I though were mostly stupid. But I did think a few boys were cute. I had crushes on both girls and boys in HS, but no boys even asked me out until I joined the field hockey team my sophomore year. I guess they liked the way I looked in that plaid kilt and knee socks. Lol. I won't deny the uniform was part of appeal of joining. I had been noticing how good girls looked in it. But I also just wanted to play a sport.
Anyways, boys started asking me out and I went on a few good dates and few disastrous dates. I learned it takes me awhile to get comfortable with guys, but I'm definitely not strictly a lesbian.
However, I didn't have any serious boyfriends in HS, and I ended up going to senior prom with a a couple of my single girl friends, and I had a ball. I danced with with girls and guys, and I was glad I didn't have a boyfriend who would have wanted me dance with only him.
When I got to college, I started actually going on real dates with girls, instead of just fooling around. Then after two years, I took a break from college, came out as bi to my family, and moved to Portland, OR, to live with my aunt (who is a lesbian) for about a year and a half. In Portland, I met a lesbian (met a LOT of lesbians in Portland actually) who inspired me to join an Americorps program (like domestic Peace Corps) which is how I ended up in Denver doing environmental work. I also went back to college in Denver.

Jesus this sounds more like a life story. I don't know how to simplify it or not go OT. Shrug
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