Random Thoughts IX

Aww sad Blaine (puke)

eli_ wrote:

voteforalice1 wrote:

Yeahhhh i wanna dance with somebody, with somebody who loves meeee.

yay

My little brother stopped by for a visit today! So nice! I don't see him too often, and usually if want to see him I have to badger him for days or weeks about it until he finds the time. So it was such a pleasant surprise when he called and wanted to drop by. I'm happy

MissLilly wrote:

My little brother stopped by for a visit today! So nice! I don't see him too often, and usually if want to see him I have to badger him for days or weeks about it until he finds the time. So it was such a pleasant surprise when he called and wanted to drop by. I'm happy

so sweet of him!

I was just going to take a shower when my little sister asks if she can borrow my laptop
me: hahaha no
and she was all like whyyy not, you don't want me to see your internet history
me: no it's not that
OF COURSE I don't want you to see it!!! I actually set a password on it just in case before going


oh, and by the way, we really need to change that banner to a safer one

I agree^ but I love that banner.. Change it next week when we might get some more quality pictures?
------
Ps: Good morning everyone! Just another school day for me

MissLilly wrote:

My little brother stopped by for a visit today! So nice! I don't see him too often, and usually if want to see him I have to badger him for days or weeks about it until he finds the time. So it was such a pleasant surprise when he called and wanted to drop by. I'm happy

family time is so nice! I'm glad you got to enjoy some!!

Shanna_ wrote:

MissLilly wrote:

My little brother stopped by for a visit today! So nice! I don't see him too often, and usually if want to see him I have to badger him for days or weeks about it until he finds the time. So it was such a pleasant surprise when he called and wanted to drop by. I'm happy

family time is so nice! I'm glad you got to enjoy some!!

It really is! Especially with him. Apart from the first few years of his life we haven't grown up together, and our age difference is so big, so it's been really difficult to establish a real connection with him. And I've often felt that I am forcing him to integrate back into our family since I've always been the one having to ask him to spend time with me. So the fact that he today, of his own free will, called and wanted to come visit means quite a lot!

Thats great Lilly!! I've had a family filled 24 hrs too. Dinner with my mum and sister last night and lunch with my dad and sister today. It was nice.

Tuk17 wrote:

I agree^ but I love that banner.. Change it next week when we might get some more quality pictures?

Good idea! I like it.

I dunno where I can post so maybe I just leave my msg here.

Actually I'm majo, and everything that I'm going to say is 100% true with no crazy talk, but I do know some of them is kind of crazy and unbelievable.

I had a hard journey coming out or in love life in general.

I knew I was gay when I was........ 10 maybe? and I accepted myself totally. I got my first love with only last for .... okay.. a really short time that I dun remember, and then we broke up. I told my parents that I'm gay. They sent me to the psychologist, as I'm not an adult, although the psychologist knows I'm NORMAL, I need to under "treatment". And of cause, nothing can be done.

I am the only child in a middle class family, a normal childhood, and I was sent to the best school in Hong Kong and I'm always a good student with good grades. My dad dun even drink a bottle of beer but he cannot control of his temper. I will throw things, and even beat me. They always say they are not, in chinese, they said they just "hit" me, but to be honest, I dun see the difference. I know it's not like the physical abuse in TV, but still, it hurts. My family, and the extended family is a REALLY traditional Christian family, they are that crazy to the state that they cannot accept Muslim working as a maid in their homes. My dad will beat (or hit, whatever) if I am pro Japanese, as he said Japanese is always the enemy of Chinese.......................................><

Okay, then, this part is crazy. I got my first serious relationship which lasted for 3 years. We moved in together before. She is a straight girl and just happened to be with me. She then, seriously, go for a beauty contest, and in Hong Kong, this will make you a TV celebrity, and actually got 2 awards. I was then need to be treated as the closeted gf which no one can see. And everyday for a year, I was worrying I will be on the newspaper one day and everyone knows that I'm gay. And then, after a year in the entertainment business, we broke up.

That was a really bad broke up, because I was kind of emotionally abuse for the whole year, she always say she's not with me and I'm crazy. And then she's having sex with me and said I rape her. We moved in before in UK, she said I kidnapped her to UK. How can I kidnap her to one of the best universities in UK and got the best student award for the whole faculty?

And then I got an emotional meltdown and I come out with my parents, again. This time, dun laugh, one night, my mum thinking I was trying to kill her when I just stare at her and she called those Christian group come over to our home. I was like...... WTF? And then go to the psychiatrist............. I dun freaking know what's going on. I was trying to stay overnight in the hotel and my parents called the police. That's just chaos.

They said they cannot accept I'm gay, and I have broken THEIR dreams and I was telling lies............... one night, I didn't held back the window curtain and my dad scold me. I said why I need to do exactly what he said and he finally beat me and my head hit the wardrobe.

Okay... a few years later.

I got a potential gf, but getting REALLY bad recently. Actually I'm fed up on what she asked me to do, and I hate being treated as crap. I'm really calm this time as I'm totally over her. Seriously, she knew I like her, and she texted me 3am in the morning telling me she is with another newly met girl on the bed and ask me what to do!!! That's crazy. I dun need to teach you how to fuck a girl! Okay, but then when she asked me if I like her, I said "I was", but now I'm not. and then she's getting mad and said I'm telling lies. I was like, okay, I heard you was on the phone with another potential gf just 30 mins ago and now what you wanna me to say?

At last she makes every person in the group hate me and I think that's childish. She's 25 for god's sakes!.

Anyways, my mum asked me why I cancelled the Phuket trip in 2 weeks time (that trip I was planning to go with that girl) and I dun wanna telling any lies. I just told her the whole story and she's getting really mad. She's crying this time and said they will disown me. To be honest, I can live on my own. But in Chinese society, you just cannot move out by yourself, nearly everyone is living with their family until they are getting married. Or even after that.

I'm kind of frustrated right now and I dunno who I can talk to.

Hey majo! Welcome! I'm so curious to know how did you find us... Are you on Glee Forum?

Anyway, I think everybody here has different and sometimes difficult stories about the coming out/being gay process and we try to share our experiences and help each other. In the LGBT thread you can find more of our stories. We will listen and I hope we can help you too.

Hey majo! Welcome to the thread! Ditto to what Isa just said.

Welcome majo!

Sounds like you've had, and are having a hard time. I don't know what to say, but have a hug I hope it works out for you!

Oh wow Majo, that is a lot of heartache right there. I wish I had to some great advice but it's hard saying when societies are so different. Being true to yourself is sometimes the hardest thing to do but in the end it's what you have to do. Living for other peoples hopes and expectations will only hurt in the end. Hopefully your parents can see that in the near future and understand that you have to live your life being true to yourself.

Isa wrote:

Hey majo! Welcome! I'm so curious to know how did you find us... Are you on Glee Forum?

Anyway, I think everybody here has different and sometimes difficult stories about the coming out/being gay process and we try to share our experiences and help each other. In the LGBT thread you can find more of our stories. We will listen and I hope we can help you too.

yea.. on the glee forum, a person send me this link.

Basically living in a Chinese society is sucks. You know in Hong Kong, we were arguing on whether the law can protect same sex couple in domestic abuse and the LGBT group lost, because they said LGBT ppl will never form a family and thus there will not be domestic abuse. I was like... what the heck?!?!?

You guys maybe talking about same sex marriage, but in Hong Kong, they cannot even believe there's gay families.

Also... even in the LGBT community, boylish gal should go with girlish gal and vice versa. I am a girly gal but I just date really girly gals and I was treated as......................... the odd one out in the community.

Actually I really need to thank Glee in general. I was in depression 2 years ago when I watch glee. They give me strength to move on.

I guess an option for you is to move out of China. Maybe go back to the UK?

MissLilly wrote:

I guess an option for you is to move out of China. Maybe go back to the UK?

actually I have thought of it. I got a few options in my hand, eg. Canada, UK.... my dad is Macau natives so I got the Portuguese passport and I can live in UK as long as I want.

But UK has strong strong strong race discrimination. Northeast England is just crazy! I was scold by school's officials and bus drivers, like I dunno English or something like that. And no one help me when I was dropped by the bus driver in the middle of nowhere just because he forgot to stop the car even I have pressed the stop button. I argued with him and he dun stop, and after a 1-2 miles, he stopped in the middle of nowhere and asking me to get off.

Hey, majo!

Wow, sounds like you've really had a hard time because of being gay. If your family isn't going to accept you being gay and keep trying to coerce you into living a straight life, and your dad is physically abusive, you probably need to get away from them. Maybe someday they will come around and you can make peace with them, but if you stick around they may keep beating you down, holding you back, and keeping you depressed. I guess moving back to the UK is the best option for you, right now, but since you mention racism against Asians being a con there, have you ever considered moving to the Pacific Northwest in the US (San Francisco, Portland, Seattle areas) or Canada (Vancouver) I know they have really huge Asian and gay/lesbian communities in though places. I lived in Portland, OR for a couple years, and it was awesome.

I want to talk more, but I can't right now. I've gotta go to work.

Drunk.

The US would be a good option. The only tricky bit I guess is getting a green card which is hard, I've looked into it. The UK I don't think is so bad if you pick where you go. I haven't spent a lot of time in the NE, only been there for work meetings and stuff so I don't know? But London, Liverpool, Manchester all have big Chinese communities. I can't see there being any issue in places like that.

Span_ski wrote:

The US would be a good option. The only tricky bit I guess is getting a green card which is hard, I've looked into it. The UK I don't think is so bad if you pick where you go. I haven't spent a lot of time in the NE, only been there for work meetings and stuff so I don't know? But London, Liverpool, Manchester all have big Chinese communities. I can't see there being any issue in places like that.

I was in Durham and that's sucks. Even the Chinese community in Newcastle is definitely not strong enough.

My family rejected the green card around 10 years ago, so I dun think I can have another shot.

I'm looking into Canada now, I got my cousins and aunts in Calgary and they know I'm gay and they are completely fine. But the question is really technical: I can applied as skilled worker as far as I know but my friends also told me it's hard to actually get a job in Canada without the PR. I just cannot go to Canada and do nothing, although I have graduated and has been working, I have just been working for a short time and I dun have much savings to support me from not doing things for a year or 2 in Canada.

Calgary wouldn't be bad, if you can stand the cold in the winter. And there are always things you could do to make a little bit of money, and if you don't have too many bills and too much debt you can make that little bit stretch a long way and live fairly comfortably (and frugally). When I lived in Portland, I lived with my aunt, and I barely worked at all, but I had almost no bills. I had no car, all I really needed to buy was a metro-card each month, which was about $60. I didn't eat out or spend hardly any money on entertainment. I did a lot of free stuff, and used the library a lot (you can get all kinds of DVDs for free from library. I don't know why so many people don't know this).

It's very expensive to live in Alberta. Then again, it is in southern Ontario as well.

That being said, Alberta and BC are the two best places to find jobs in Canada right now.

"We were gonna travel the world, from Alberta to Ontarioooo"

That's all I can think about whenever you bring up those cities Mike. Damn HIMYM

and thanks to its 100th aniversary a new generation discovers the Titanic. I feel old
I remember when I was a kid and my friends used to kiss Leo diCaprio's poster before going to bed...