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 Brittana fanfiction

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mardou
MissLilly
Span_ski
Jugz da' Clown
eli_
Dina
Shanna_
Mike`
Cora_
Alison DiLaurentis
Tuk17
Charles
Isa
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Cora_

Cora_


Posts : 232

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyMon Jan 09, 2012 6:22 pm

eli_ wrote:
if the latest spoilers are true, what does that mean for your fic, Cora? Still going for a Brittana happy ending?
Definitely a happy ending, but maybe I'll incorporate the whole insecurity issue of Santana thinking Brittany doesn't feel the same way. (The nice thing about fanfic is that you can solve it however you want.)

Would it be weird if there were flashbacks in the story? Since it would start in January of the year following graduation, there'd be a lot of gaps. In the first chapter I'm going to fill in a lot of stuff, but occasionally I might want to go back and show an entire scene in detail, something that happened before the story started. Like how they ended up saying goodbye and the terms they parted under.

Is it plausible at all that Brittany doesn't even know how she feels until it's tested? Like, she takes Santana so much for granted that she doesn't realize how strong her feelings are until they're away from each other? Or until she feels jealousy for the first time?
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Mike`

Mike`


Posts : 1711
Location : Ontario, Canada

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyMon Jan 09, 2012 6:23 pm

You write the flashbacks well, so I think you could pull them off effectively. smile Plus with the dates and stuff, you do make a good point about kind of needing to for gap filling.
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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyMon Jan 09, 2012 6:27 pm

Cora that's amazing! Suddenly I feel more interested in Brittany as a character. How come that never happens when I'm watching the actual show?

I'm also working on that little fanart/banner thing I've told you about. This fic is going to be exciting! Again, the prospect of reading it makes me happier than thinking about new episodes.
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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyTue Jan 10, 2012 4:35 pm

This is what I'm working on btw, just a little side project to celebrate the new fic.
Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 Tumblr_lxlpfzH4bI1r9svhd
it's still just a sketch though, they don't look like them at all, especially Rachel. It's the one by Santana, I figured Cora's version wouldn't have bangs. And she's staring at the camera because it's Rachel.
The weird white things above Kurt are gonna be the fic title, when you decide on that one let us know.


Maybe Santana is too grumpy, isn't she...?
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Dina

Dina


Posts : 1194
Location : GER

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyTue Jan 10, 2012 4:38 pm

eli_ wrote:
This is what I'm working on btw, just a little side project to celebrate the new fic.
Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 Tumblr_lxlpfzH4bI1r9svhd
it's still just a sketch though, they don't look like them at all, especially Rachel. It's the one by Santana, I figured Cora's version wouldn't have bangs. And she's staring at the camera because it's Rachel.
The weird white things above Kurt are gonna be the fic title, when you decide on that one let us know.


Maybe Santana is too grumpy, isn't she...?

Wow, that's really impressive eli!
I could totally tell who Rachel is btw.
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Isa

Isa


Posts : 3823

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyTue Jan 10, 2012 4:43 pm

I could totally tell who they are too.

It looks good. I'm excited for this collaboration. More than I'm with the show itself (anyone surprised?).

And, lol, of course Santana is grumpy, she is a lesbian afterall, and the #1 Brittana fan. So, that makes her grumpy for all eternity!
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Mike`

Mike`


Posts : 1711
Location : Ontario, Canada

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyTue Jan 10, 2012 4:51 pm

Eeeeeeeeh, I love it!!
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Cora_

Cora_


Posts : 232

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyTue Jan 10, 2012 6:48 pm

OMG Eli, that's adorable!! I could easily tell who they all were. And Santana, too grumpy? Are you kidding? Laughing I love your drawing so much. You have such a great power of suggestion in such few lines... I don't know how to explain it, because I know nothing about art. But you know what I mean. Thank you so much for doing this!

And Lol, I want the Rachel in my head to grow her bangs out, but she's being difficult. I'm so used to seeing Lea in them now that it's hard to stop picturing. If you think the bangs would make her more recognizable, don't worry about my weird preference.

As for a title, I'm really bad at coming up with those. The only thing I've thought of so far is "Out Here On Our Own," and I'm not that crazy about it. It seems too literal. But OTOH I like that it's ironic, because they're not really on their own when they have each other.

I've been trying to think of other song lyrics or song titles, but almost everything Brittana related from Glee has already been used. But if anyone has ideas, please throw 'em out there.
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Cora_

Cora_


Posts : 232

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyFri Jan 13, 2012 2:22 pm

This is such a random question, but do we know any of the jazz band guys' names? Like, the characters' names? Do they even have names?

Sorry for using you guys as my unpaid research department. tongue

If it's okay, I might post the first section of the first chapter here when I get it done. I feel like I need some beta readers just for fact checking and to see if it feels in-character.
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Span_ski

Span_ski


Posts : 3367
Location : UK

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyFri Jan 13, 2012 2:35 pm

I don't know the jazz band guys names unfortunately, but I'll try and do a bit of research for you...

I love reading your fanfic Cora, so I can't wait to read the first Chapter here... you should start a new thread if you like?? smile I think we can do it as a sub thread of this one?

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Dina

Dina


Posts : 1194
Location : GER

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyFri Jan 13, 2012 2:37 pm

Cora_ wrote:
This is such a random question, but do we know any of the jazz band guys' names? Like, the characters' names? Do they even have names?

Sorry for using you guys as my unpaid research department. tongue

If it's okay, I might post the first section of the first chapter here when I get it done. I feel like I need some beta readers just for fact checking and to see if it feels in-character.

According to this interview the background band characters don't have names:

Quote :

APK: Now, understand, I’m a huge supporter of the Glee Band and think they should get their own spin-off series but I have to ask… does your character have a name?

SH: No name, if we had names they would feel like we’re real people so it would be harder for them to ignore us I think.

APK: If he doesn’t, I suggest you name him right now. A World Wide Exclusive! The character name for the bass player is?

SH: Well I’ve actually had conversations about this with my partner in crime John Lock, his theory is that we must be Foreign Exchange students, which makes some pieces fit together, so if we’re going that route I’d probably be a Johan or Sergio or something but I think we the band wouldn’t go by our “Real” names we would have sweet nicknames, Like Patches or Snickers or like Splinter.

APK: All right, then, Snickers is it! Now this is sounding like a sweet gang, as well as a band.

Source: http://www.adampknave.com/2011/04/04/an-exclusive-interview-with-glee-band-member-scott-henson/
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Isa

Isa


Posts : 3823

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyFri Jan 13, 2012 3:10 pm

Cora_ wrote:
If it's okay, I might post the first section of the first chapter here when I get it done. I feel like I need some beta readers just for fact checking and to see if it feels in-character.

Oh please, do it. yahoo
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Charles

Charles


Posts : 3851
Location : Wales

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyFri Jan 13, 2012 3:14 pm

Isabela wrote:
Cora_ wrote:
If it's okay, I might post the first section of the first chapter here when I get it done. I feel like I need some beta readers just for fact checking and to see if it feels in-character.

Oh please, do it. yahoo

Seconded! yahoo
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Tuk17

Tuk17


Posts : 641
Location : B.C, Canada

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptyFri Jan 13, 2012 7:24 pm

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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 9:20 am

^^After this chapter I actually wrote to the author and asked her why Brittany is always so childish, it makes Brittana so creepy, even here. When Santana was asking her about her mom in the car (you know, before they did the other stuff asd) it reminded me of those adults trying to talk with abused kids.
Good thing is, she replied immediately and we had a nice chat about it. What a nice girl, I bet she get dozens of those messages, I mean, look how many notes that fic has.
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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 3:05 pm

@Cora
Is Rachel going to wear the same things in New York? I was thinking Santana and Kurt should do an intervention.
bliss
About the title: are they still going to sing on the roof? I think you mentioned something like that. Maybe the title or a lyric from the songs they're going to sing? Just an idea


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Cora_

Cora_


Posts : 232

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 3:42 pm

eli_ wrote:
@Cora
Is Rachel going to wear the same things in New York? I was thinking Santana and Kurt should do an intervention.
bliss
About the title: are they still going to sing on the roof? I think you mentioned something like that. Maybe the title or a lyric from the songs they're going to sing? Just an idea
LOL, yeah, I think a fashion intervention is a good idea. Esp. since they'll have to be seen in public with her. I mean, she would still be Rachel, but she could be slightly more chic.

Still can't come up with a title. I was thinking maybe Hometown Glory (after the Adele song, since it's kind of a love song to cities), but NYC is not technically their hometown. I guess they're trying to make a home there, though? I don't know.

I'm going to post the little beginning section to Chapter 1 here. Well, I say *little* but it's not all that short. This first part just sort of plunges right into the action. Then the 2nd section will go back in time and summarize her time in NY, how she ended up living with Kurt and Rachel, etc. Then there are 2 more sections after that (with Brittany arriving at the end) for the first chapter.

It's still kind of rough-drafty, especially the beginning and end sections. Please be honest and tell me if it feels in character and if it's something you would even want to continue reading.


****************

Six months. That was how long it had been. Six months, two weeks, and four days since she'd last seen Brittany. Six months, two weeks, four days, and... Santana glanced at the clock as she plumped up the couch cushions one more time. Five hours. Not that she was counting. Because she was a mature adult now, she reminded herself for what felt like the hundredth time today. A mature, independent adult who was living on her own, or sort of on her own, and she wanted that to be obvious to Brittany. This was a whole new life.

She straightened up and looked around the small living room of the apartment, forcing herself to take a deep breath to steady her nerves. It was almost time. She could be here any minute now.

Moving over toward the front window, she looked down four storeys into the street below, checking for the Honda Civic that dorky jazz band guy drove. Jeff. Or John. Or Jeremy... something like that. She'd never really bothered to learn their names. But apparently this Jeff, or John, had been headed to New York at the same time as Brittany, and so he'd offered to drive her if she helped pay for gas. Santana resolutely quenched the idea that the guy had had some ulterior motive in suggesting this road trip. That was the old her, the possessive, paranoid Santana. Not the new and improved grown-up.

Because it wasn't like she had any right to be jealous, anyway. They weren't together. Not in that sense, not anymore. As for what would happen now, now that Brittany had earned her diploma after an extra semester at McKinley and was finally arriving in the city... she had no idea. They'd agreed, as the mature adults they were now, that they would take things slow and see what happened. She didn't even know for sure if she was staying, or if it was just a visit. It was a trial run. That was why Santana had made up the sofa bed in the living room yesterday, even though it had broken her heart just a little bit to know they'd be sleeping in separate rooms. But still, she knew it was the smart way to go. They had a lot of catching up to do. Six months was a long time to be apart. If she was honest with herself, sometimes it felt more like six years.

It was just that so much had happened. Beginning, of course, with the confusing, melancholy way she and Brittany had parted. Even now, she didn't know quite what to make of their last face-to-face conversation. She started to play it back in her head again, but before she could make any progress, she heard a distant echo of voices, and then footsteps clomping up the stairs. She tensed for a second, hopeful. Had she missed the car? But the voices became clearer as they moved down the hallway. And unfortunately, these voices in particular were all too familiar. It was just them. Shit. She'd been hoping Brittany would get here first, so they could have at least a few minutes to themselves. But of course not. Not with her luck.

Now the voices were approaching the door, loud and argumentative.

"Kurt, it's not that I'm denying your considerable expertise on the subject, it's just that clearly Mandy Patinkin's most memorable role was Che in the original run of Evita. It's an iconic part."

"I'm not going to debate your obviously clichéd definition of iconic, but Sunday in the Park with George is without a doubt his superior performance. The character's name is in the title. What more do you want?"

"He won a Tony for Evita! How can you argue with that?"

"Oh Rachel," Kurt said in a breezy, smug way as the door swung open. "Your opinions are downright adorable in their wrongness." Noticing her standing by the living room window and staring at them with badly suppressed irritation, he added, "Let's ask Santana."

She pounced on this opportunity with a lethal glint in her eyes. "You know what, that is a super idea. Let's ask Santana. Because I'm guessing you two scenery-chewers are talking about something Broadway-related, right?" She ambled toward them with her arms crossed, getting into her stride now. "Like for example which role was slightly gayer than the other? Or maybe which musical would be least likely to make an audience want to stab Q-tips doused with gasoline into their ears, and then light them on fire just to make it stop? Well guess what, Lucy and Ethel, turns out you're right, I can settle this debate for you. Because whatever you're arguing about? The answer is, they both sucked. So yayyyy, you both win, and now you can shut up about it!"

Rachel unbuttoned her coat in a weary manner, glancing around the room. "I take it Brittany isn't here yet?"

Santana took a deep breath to recover from her rant. As always, she felt a little better afterwards. She moved back over toward the window. "No. But it's only fifteen after five. She said between five and six."

"Well, it's a good thing you're not watching the clock," Kurt tossed off in a casual manner, receiving a glare in response.

She checked the street again. Still nothing. Biting her lip, she forced down a sigh of impatience. Then, looking around the room and realizing something was missing, she asked, "Rachel, where are the flowers?"

In the middle of hanging her coat up on the hook near the door, Rachel's hand froze. "Oh no," she said in a small voice.

Santana came back toward her, already livid. "You have got to be fucking kidding me. The one thing I asked you to do!"

"Look, I can explain!" she said, backing up to put some distance between them. "Here's what happened. I was on my way to the florist's when I passed a group of Catholic schoolgirls in the park, singing Rihanna songs to their boyfriends from the top of a picnic table. They definitely had potential, but their breathing was all wrong, and their dancing wasn't so much sexy as... pornographic. So, being a champion of the arts like I am, I stopped to give them some pointers. Anyway, one thing led to another, and to make a long story short..."

"Too late," Kurt muttered.

"I ended up doing some of the songs myself," she went on. "And I think they really appreciated the lesson. It's true, they stuck gum on my purse, and I think one of them may have called me something bad in Chinese. But later, when they think back on it, I'm confident my advice will sink in and make a difference in their lives." She finished up with an expression of beatific self-sacrifice. You could practically see the halo. "After all, Santana, what's more important? A bouquet of flowers that'll just wilt and die, or the opportunity to share my talent with a new generation of performers?"

Santana continued to stare at her in baffled outrage for a few more seconds, and then she lunged. With cat-like quickness Kurt caught her around the waist to hold her back, just as Rachel ducked away and darted behind the couch to use it as a barricade. It was like a perfectly choreographed ballet they'd enacted countless times.

"I wonder how you're gonna like performing without teeth, Saint Rihanna, because I am about to get all up in your face!" But Kurt kept a firm grip on her. Due to these frequent outbursts, his upper body strength was increasing. It was a strange way to work out, but effective.

"All right, all right!" Rachel held her hands up in a placating gesture. "I'll go to the florist right now, okay? Will that make you happy?"

"No, it won't make me happy, because they're closed, you idiot! I told you they closed at five."

"Santana..." Rachel shut her eyes briefly, resting her hands on the back of the couch. "I'm sorry. I got distracted. I don't know what else to say!"

She felt the venom drain out of her, to be replaced by simple disappointment. "You are unbelievable, you know that?"

Kurt tentatively dropped his arms, staying close just in case things escalated again. "To be fair," he said, "while I agree that Rachel's self-centeredness is astronomical, is this really any worse than the time we missed the Jersey Shore marathon because someone stole the cable money and bought forty dollar nail polish?"

Damn it, why did he have to bring that up? Santana avoided eye contact with them both, a little sheepish now, but trying to maintain her dignity. "How many times do I have to apologize for that?

"You never apologized for that," Rachel couldn't help pointing out.

"It was more of a rhetorical question," she muttered, examining her nails, which still looked amazing. That polish was so worth it.

"My point is," Kurt went on, "We've all done things we're not proud of."

"I've got it!" Rachel exclaimed now, her face suddenly lighting up with an idea. "I'll cook dinner for everyone. To make up for the flowers. Brittany would like that, right?" And without waiting for an answer, she headed into the kitchen, as if fleeing the scene of the crime.

"We're not eating any of your vegan shit!" Santana called after her. And in a strange way, she got a thrill just from saying the word "we" in relation to herself and Brittany. It had been so long. We're going to be a 'we' again, she realized. At least for a little while. And if things worked out, maybe longer.

But it was dangerous to think that far ahead, so she stopped herself. The mature thing to do, she reminded herself, was to take it one day at a time. She turned her attention back to the window. The street below was empty in a way it hardly ever was, almost as if it was mocking her. She noticed Kurt out of the corner of her eye still hanging around, and prayed he would retreat to his room, or go keep Rachel company in the kitchen and leave her the hell alone. But no such luck. Instead he pulled out a fresh copy of the New York Times, settling down on the couch and flipping on the lamp beside it.

This ostentatious reading of the newspaper was one of his new habits, and she halfway suspected he did it on purpose in a way best suited to annoy her. First he unfolded the thing and shook it out, the crackle of the sheets filling the silence of the room and making her cringe, especially since her nerves were already on edge. Then he held it out at arms' length, turned his nose up, crossed his legs prissily, and stared at it. All he needed was a pipe and a velvet smoking jacket to complete the picture. He even turned the pages in a showy way. In the past she'd wondered why he didn't just read it online like everyone else who wasn't senile yet, but now she realized it was because the online edition wouldn't give him such a perfect opportunity to behave like a snooty asshat.

"Are you actually even reading that?" she finally sneered, when there was still no sign of the car below and she couldn't take it any longer. "Or are you just trying to become the most boring performance artist in the history of time?"

He turned another page, and without acknowledging her remark, asked, "Why don't you just call her and see how close she is?"

She looked away and waited a few seconds before answering. "I've already called her six times. I don't want to seem paranoid."

Kurt made no response to this, though somehow he managed to turn even silence into sardonic judgment.

Knowing she shouldn't, she checked the clock again. 5:30. Where the hell was she? Maybe they'd stopped to eat dinner somewhere. Maybe they would bring take-out for everyone. That would serve Rachel right, if no one touched her meal. It would probably suck anyway. Most of her food looked like raw sewage and didn't smell much better.

By now it was dark enough outside that Santana could see her own image in the glass of the window, the reflection cast by the lamp behind her. What she saw provided one more source of anxiety. "Kurt," she said with a sense of urgency, getting up and standing in front of him. "My hair's doing that thing again."

He glanced up at her. "I can see that. Probably happened when you launched yourself at Rachel." He went back to reading.

"Well? Fix it!"

He sighed heavily and lowered the paper. "Why do I always have to be the one to fix it?"

"Because. That's what you're here for. You're like, my fairy godbrother. Now get off your ass and use your magic wand on me." She headed toward the bathroom and then stopped, amused at herself. "Is it just me, or does that sound so wanky?"

With obvious reluctance, he stood and followed her. "It does when you say it."

In the tiny bathroom, she hopped up onto the sink. While Kurt rummaged around in a drawer for whatever it was he needed to restore her to hotness, she examined her surroundings critically, trying to see it through a newcomer's eyes. Had it always been this drab and depressing? How had she gotten used to this?

"We should get a new shower curtain."

"What's wrong with it?" He squeezed a dollop of gel into his hand and began working it into her hair.

"It's gray. It looks like a cast-off from a Soviet orphanage. God only knows what kind of microbes are breeding in it. I mean, that Kurt Cobain look-alike you brought home last weekend? I'm pretty sure it was the first time in months he'd been exposed to indoor plumbing."

"Brittany is not coming to New York to see our shower curtain, Santana. She's coming to see you. Hold your head straight."

"I know that." She angled her chin up, trying to keep it level so he could work his magic. "I just... want things to be nice." In a quieter voice that she hoped didn't sound too pathetic, she added, "I really want her to like it here."

Kurt's expression softened, and he seemed on the verge of saying something reassuring, but before he could manage it, they heard quick footsteps coming down the hall. Rachel appeared in the doorway, her lips compressed in a thin line. She wrung her hands nervously against the hideous frilly apron she wore. Her entire demeanor indicated a person who had been preparing for a role her entire life, but now at the last minute had developed unaccountable stage fright. Either that, or she just really needed to pee. They stared at her, waiting.

"What?" Kurt finally demanded, when she still hadn't said anything.

"Just... don't freak out, Santana. Try to stay calm. Deep breaths."

Naturally, these words caused her heart to start pounding and a sickening jolt to pass through her entire body. "What are you talking about?"

"Your phone battery must be dead," Rachel continued. "They've been trying to call you. I'm not exactly sure how they got my new number... maybe..."

"Rachel, just say it!" Kurt snapped. Santana was grateful, because she wasn't sure she could have spoken at all.

Stepping forward into the already crowded bathroom, Rachel spoke directly to Santana. "They had car trouble. Brittany and John. They're staying at a motel in New Jersey."

She waited, but that seemed to be all. "So she's okay?"

"Of course she is, she's fine. It's just that... she won't be here tonight. I knew you'd be upset."

Santana took a deep breath and let it out, closing her eyes for a second in relief. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to hug Rachel or throttle her.

"Jesus H. Christ, Debbie Downer!" Kurt said. "You don't begin an announcement about car trouble with the words 'Try to stay calm.'"

"Well, I'm sorry," she said defensively. "I'm not used to delivering bad news. People usually want me to deliver good news. Sometimes through song."

While they were sniping at each other, Santana let the full meaning of the information sink in, and now she felt herself transition from a state of relief to one of simple disappointment. Brittany wasn't coming. After an entire day of waiting, after hours spent getting everything ready... she wasn't coming at all. Suddenly all the excitement and nervous tension of the day drained away from her, and she felt exhausted.

Rachel added, "She said she'll almost definitely be here tomorrow, as soon as they can get the car fixed. And she said to tell you she's sorry. And to charge your phone."

"Yeah. Whatever. I mean, it's no big deal," Santana said unconvincingly. "It's just one more day, right?" She tried not to let them see how deflated she felt. She slid down off the sink and turned around, pretending to be occupied with putting the gel back in the medicine cabinet, but in the mirror she could see the two of them exchange concerned glances behind her back, and she hated that. They looked like the parents of an unpredictable toddler wondering whether to expect a tantrum.

Kurt held up a styling brush, questioningly. "Do you still want me to..."

"No," she said, pushing past him into the hall. "Forget it. It doesn't matter."

She headed toward her tiny cell of a bedroom, wanting only to be left alone.

"You know," Rachel's voice followed her, in a tone that indicated she was trying to cheer her up. "It's a good thing I didn't get the flowers after all. They might have been dead by the time she got here."

Not bothering to give any kind of response to this, she shut her door to the sound of Kurt hissing in a stage whisper, "Really, Rachel?"

Now, finally, she was alone. She stood against the door for a few seconds, reminding herself like she'd been doing all day that she was an adult. An adult didn't retreat to her bedroom and sulk when she got disappointing news. An adult didn't curl up in a self-pitying ball on her bed, the way she was doing now. An adult most certainly didn't bury her head in the pile of pillows and try desperately not to cry, torturing herself with thoughts of the one person she longed to see and touch more than anyone else in the world, and who she was irrationally afraid that fate or God or simply indifferent chance was going to keep from her, forever. A true adult wouldn't do any of those things.

Then what would they do in this situation? she wondered. The mature thing. The rational thing. Which would be to get up and turn some lights on, first, so that the lurid neon glow of the pizza place across the street wasn't the only thing illuminating the room. Then, probably, to put her phone on the charger. And then maybe to go and help with dinner. And after all that, to go to bed early and get some sleep, so that she could get up early and live this entire day over again tomorrow, hopefully with a better outcome.

She considered this course of action. She almost even convinced herself to do it. Then, instead, she grabbed her iPod, kicked off her shoes, and pulled the covers up and all the way over her head, giving in to the tears. Fuck it. Tomorrow, she would seriously start acting like an adult. When Brittany got here, for sure. No doubt about it. But just for tonight, she was more than okay with still being a teenager.

***********


Last edited by Cora_ on Sat Jan 14, 2012 5:03 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Charles

Charles


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Location : Wales

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 4:07 pm

Loved it. More, please? smile Definitely feels in character. And it's something that I'd like to read more of so much that I want it right now.
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Mike`

Mike`


Posts : 1711
Location : Ontario, Canada

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 4:10 pm

I love it Cora!!! All three are so spot on!


Last edited by Mike` on Sat Jan 14, 2012 4:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 4:15 pm

yahoo
PERFECT. And it made me laugh a lot, especially Rachel. Can't wait to read what you have in store for Brittany
clapping
you still got it. The fanfic writer magic!
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Isa

Isa


Posts : 3823

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 4:51 pm

I'm so glad you posted here, Cora. And I agree with everybody: feels in character and it's super funny and sad at the same time. I love it. I was trying to give you more advice and all, but I think it looks pretty good already. I love the thing about the flowers. Your Rachel is perfect the entire time.

congrats

Just here, I think there's a mistake:

"she could see the two of them exchange concerned glasses behind her back"

Concerned glances, I suppose? Laughing

-------------------

I love Eli's idea about the intervention on Rachel's fashion. I think Santana should get some kind of intervention too. I don't know exactly what, but it should be fun. Or maybe Kurt and Rachel could help her on arranging a perfect date with Brittany. She wants to cook for Brittany but she can barely boil an egg so they try to help her and it's a mess?

What else? I think Kurt and Rachel are definitely morning people and Santana is not. That could cause some fun scenes with her waking up late while Rachel is a mad woman cleaning the house and stuff. Or Santana super depressed because Brittany is away and Rachel and Kurt need to get her out of the apartment after days when she just want to stay on the couch watching some reality show.

Just throwing ideas.
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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 4:55 pm

Are these the same Brittany and Santana from Lake Hope btw? Like, same parents, same sisters etc?
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Cora_

Cora_


Posts : 232

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 5:02 pm

HA HA yes, it's glances. And now I'm picturing them, like, switching pairs of glasses behind her back, and it's cracking me up. I'm so insanely amused by typos. Laughing Thank you for catching that!

Love the ideas! I'm keeping an idea folder with everyone's suggestions.

Brittany will end up arriving in the middle of the night while they're all asleep on the couch (they got the car fixed early), so she will be in the chapter for a bit at the end. And somehow I don't think their "sleeping in separate beds" plan is going to last more than a few minutes.

I know it's really dialogue heavy, but the second part will have a lot more description since it'll detail all the months she's been in NY. I can't seem to help telling the story through dialogue, though. It's just because in my head it's like I'm watching an ep of Glee, and I want to just transcribe what they're saying.

Thank you so much for the feedback! It all helps, especially the specific stuff.

Quote :
Are these the same Brittany and Santana from Lake Hope btw? Like, same parents, same sisters etc?
I *think* so, since canon hasn't outright contradicted it yet, and it may not at all for Brittany, since it seems like we may not learn much about her family this season. As more eps air, though, I'm not really sure whether I'll incorporate that new stuff or not.
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eli_

eli_


Posts : 1533
Location : Italy

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 5:07 pm

I like it dialogue-heavy, since you're spectacular at writing them
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Dina

Dina


Posts : 1194
Location : GER

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PostSubject: Re: Brittana fanfiction   Brittana fanfiction - Page 3 EmptySat Jan 14, 2012 5:09 pm

Your Rachel is hilarious. Love it!
I really like that it's dialogue heavy, so don't worry too much there smile

No ideas from me. I'm sure that you know way better about what you're writing than I ever could and so far it sounds really good Thumbs Up
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